NIAGARA, Wis. — Catchy little title, isn’t it? I wish I could take credit for thinking of it, but once again I draw on Roy H. Williams’ Monday Morning Memo. Recently, Williams wrote about our frenetic, overscheduled lives: the causes as well as a suggested solution. For many of us, our working years could certainly be described as a marathon of obligations and calendars so full they bordered on humanly impossible.

If we did not learn how to juggle and prioritize, that state of living followed us right into retirement. If you are prone to being a “busy person,” you may be asking yourself right about now, “So what is wrong with being busy? I am productive. I am contributing.” True. But are you happy? Are you healthy? The answers to those questions will serve as indicators of a potential need for change.

It is certainly good to be busy at this stage of our lives. We now have the time to pursue interests that our work schedules did not allow the time for prior to retirement. Also, we remain healthier longer when we have interests that occupy our minds and bodies. We now have time to join book clubs and study groups that stimulate our minds. We can begin our day with a brisk morning walk to keep our bones and joints in good working order. We have the freedom to set our own schedules and agendas without having to bend to the will of our boss and employer. And our kids are grown with lives and jobs of their own so there is no more car pooling or school activities to attend.

It is good to remain active. A friend of mine recently said, “I intend to live right up to the time I die.” We all laughed at its obvious meaning; taken at face value, that statement really leaves you no other choice in the matter. But the meaning behind that statement is powerful. She intends to take care of herself so that she can have a full, healthy, productive life until there is no more life to live. A physician once told me that if we can make it to age 60 without any major health issue — cancer, a heart attack, or other serious chronic disease — our odds of living into our 80s or beyond increases exponentially. While our life span is inherently genetic, we do have the ability to minimize the silent killer of our longevity — stress. And that stress is brought about by the level of activity and obligation we allow into our lives. Control it or it will control you.

What leads to most stress? Isabel Allende, in her book “My Invented Country,” claims that one factor is simply rooted in our American culture as she writes:

“The North Americans’ sense of time is very special. They are short on patience. Everything must be quick, including food and sex, which the rest of the world treats ceremoniously. Gringos invented two terms that are untranslatable into most languages: ‘snack’ and ‘quickie’ to refer to eating standing up and loving on the run. The most popular books are manuals: how to become a millionaire in ten easy lessons, how to lose fifteen pounds in a week, how to recover from your divorce, and so on. People always go around looking for shortcuts and ways to escape anything they consider unpleasant: ugliness, old age, weight, illness, poverty, and failure in any of its aspects.”

Take a moment to think about the above observation of our culture. If you doubt it, watch television commercials and pay attention to how often things valued rely on being quick, fast, easy or instant. How often do you agree to anything when you are told or believe, “Oh, this will only take a minute?” Or give in when told, “Surely you have a little time for this?” We value being needed and prize being busy despite the toll it may be taking on our lives and relationships.

Williams gave another example of just how ingrained our need for activity is when he cited the results of an experiment outlined in Science.org. Here is one paragraph.

“The researchers then decided to take the experiment a step further. For fifteen minutes, the team left participants alone in a lab room in which they could push a button and shock themselves if they wanted to.

“The results were startling. Even though all participants had previously stated that they would pay money to avoid being shocked with electricity, 67% of men and 25% of women chose to inflict it on themselves rather that just sit there quietly and think … People would rather be electrically shocked than be left alone with their thoughts.”

That is pretty sad commentary. The average American would rather endure physical pain rather than look inward and just be in the moment. No wonder we are a stressed-out nation. Even in retirement, we may find ourselves unable to shake the uneasy feelings that accompany stress. One would think it should be an easy task — especially at this stage of our lives — to unburden ourselves from the overloaded schedules and unpleasant tasks that caused our blood pressure to creep up when we were working. Time is on our side now, and we should be able to use it doing things we enjoy — or doing nothing at all. Yet, there remains a feeling of inherent value and self-worth when our schedules are full.

So, what is the solution to freeing ourselves to really enjoy all of the benefits of our retirement, or life in general if we are not yet retired? Williams suggests a simple phrase he calls “the Nancy Reagan Solution” — “Just Say No.” And he draws a distinction between “commitment” and “obligation.” Commitment is self-imposed and an admirable quality that takes place over a long period of time. We commit to being faithful and supportive to our spouse. We commit to putting the needs of our children ahead of our own. We commit to being available to our friends when they need us. We commit to our parents in their old age. Commitment is a state of living we have chosen for ourselves and that gives value and depth to our lives.

Obligation, on the other hand, is imposed upon us by others. As Williams describes it, “Obligations are thrust upon you by people who ambush you with an urgent emergency, or worse, a ‘quick question.’ These people know that quick questions often have complicated answers, but they just don’t care. They hide behind the word ‘quick’ so they can pretend they are asking nothing more of you than a flickering moment of your time and attention.” At the end of such conversations, your function as a mere sounding board has become another responsibility on your task list. You never signed on to commit yourself to another project, but now you find yourself with another obligation placed there by the person who just wanted a moment of your time for a quick question.

Our lives are ours to live. Life is not just a video game, and we are not the characters being controlled by someone else’s whims or perceived needs. No matter the stage of life in which we find ourselves, we deserve control over how we spend our time. Having that control will not only help to ensure our longevity, but will better fill that longevity with the activities we have chosen for ourselves. We can choose commitment to a job that provides us with satisfaction, to people who value us as we are, to a set of beliefs and feelings that are uniquely ours. We need to avoid obligation to anyone or anything that does not fit within our heart of hearts. To do anything less robs us of our self-esteem and the fulfillment of a life well lived.

——

NURSING HOMES/SENIOR LIVING FACILITIES

Freeman Nursing and Rehabilitation Community

Kingsford

906-774-1530

Group activities are ongoing, and doors are unlocked for visits. They welcome anyone who would like to entertain residents. Volunteers are also needed to help with crafts and other activities.

Sunday: Church on TV, 10 a.m.; coloring/residents’ choice, 1 p.m.

Monday: Rosary, 10 a.m.; room visits, 10 a.m.; music, 11:45 a.m.; gardening, 1:30 p.m.; reminisce, 2:30 p.m.

Tuesday: Church with Lisa, 10 a.m.; trivia, 11:45 a.m.; crossword, 1:30 p.m.; bingo, 2 p.m.

Wednesday: Art, 10 a.m.; music, 11:45 a.m.; finish art work, 1:30 p.m.

Thursday: All-day trip to Mexico, with taco bar for lunch.

Friday: Jam work out, 10 a.m.; math whiz, 10:30 a.m.; music, 11:45 a.m.; bingo, 2 p.m.

Saturday: Resident choice, 10 a.m.; love for color, 2 p.m.; word search, 6 p.m.

Iron County Medical Care Facility

Crystal Falls

906-874-1501

Sunday: Room visits, 9 a.m.; story telling, 10 a.m.; chair exercise, 11 a.m.; room visits, 12:30 p.m.; bingorama, 2 p.m.

Monday: Cooking, 9 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; DT luncheon, noon; room visits, 1 p.m.; bingo, 2 p.m.; Sunshine Club, 2:30 p.m.; cocoa and cookies, 6 p.m.

Tuesday: Just friends, 9:30 a.m.; hymn sing along, 10 a.m.; room visits, 1 p.m.; wildlife film, 1:30 p.m.; faces and places, 2 p.m.; romance movie, 6 p.m.

Wednesday: Coffee social/high rollers, 10 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; room visits, 1 p.m.; monthly birthday party music with Bob Larson, 2 p.m.; night bingo, 6 p.m.

Thursday: Puzzler, 9:30 a.m.; bowling, 10 a.m.; Bible study, 1 p.m.; wildlife film, 1:30 p.m.; happy hour, 2 p.m.

Friday: Crafts, 9 to 10:30 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; room visits, 1 p.m.; you be the judge, 2 p.m.; action movie, 6 p.m.

Saturday: Word game/room visits, 9 a.m.; spelling bball, 10 a.m.; geri-gym, 11 a.m.; room visits, 1 p.m.; social hour, 2 p.m.

Optalis Healthcare

(formerly Manor Care/ProMedica)

Kingsford

906-774-4805

The center is now open for visitation. Visitors no longer need to call in advance.

Sunday: Yahtzee, 9 a.m.; manicures, 10:30 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; Flip-o, 1 p.m.

Monday: Wet your whistle, 9 a.m.; chair yoga, 9:30 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; bingo, 2 p.m.

Tuesday: Wet your whistle, 9 a.m.; this or that, 9:30 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; let’s make pie, 1:30 p.m.

Wednesday: Leisure cart, 9 a.m.; devotional, 10 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; “Jeopardy,” 2 p.m.

Thursday: Leisure cart, 9 a.m.; devotional, 10 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; birthday party, 1:30 p.m.

Friday: Chips and chatter, 9 a.m.; reminiscing, 9:30 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; bingo, 2 p.m.

Saturday: Morning mixer, 9:30 a.m.; manicures, 10:30 a.m.; room visits, 11 a.m.; po-ke-no, 1 p.m.

Maryhill Manor Nursing Home

Niagara, Wis.

715-251-3172

Visitation is allowed. Daily scheduled activities continue to be for residents only.

Sunday: Coffee and tic-tac trivia, 10 a.m.; delivery of communion, 12:30 p.m.; rummage bingo, 2 p.m.

Monday: Rosary/communion, 9 a.m.; pamper and polish, 10 a.m.; joker-eno, 2 p.m.

Tuesday: Rosary/communion, 9 a.m.; exercise, kick ball, 10 a.m.; Scattegories, 2 p.m.; Chaplet of Divine Mercy, 3 p.m.

Wednesday: Rosary/communion, 9 a.m.; Yahtzee, 10 a.m.; Whammo, 2 p.m.; evening prayer, 5 p.m.

Thursday: Rosary/communion, 9 a.m.; exercise, ring toss, 10 a.m.; Scrabble, 2 p.m.

Friday: Uno, 10 a.m.; hay hour with Jim D., 2 p.m.

Saturday: Morning mingle/“Price Is Right,” 10 a.m.; comedy movie and popcorn, 2 p.m.

Florence Health Services

Florence, Wis.

715-528-4833

Visitation is allowed seven days a week in designated areas only. Each visit is limited to 30 minutes and must be scheduled in advance. All visitors will be subject to health screening before entering the facility. There are no group activities at this time.

Victorian Pines

Iron Mountain

906-774-5158

Sunday: Juice time, 10 a.m.; Bible study, 1:30 p.m.

Monday: Juice time, 10 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; birthday party, 1:30 p.m.

Tuesday: Juice time, 10 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; tenant meeting and refreshments, 1:30 p.m.

Wednesday: Juice time, 10 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; bingo and refreshments, 1:30 p.m.

Thursday: Juice time, 10 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; bingo and refreshments, 1:30 p.m.

Friday: Juice time, 10 a.m.; exercise, 11 a.m.; birthday party, 1:30 p.m.

Saturday: Juice time, 10 a.m.

Pinecrest Medical

Care Facility

Powers

906-497-5244

Sunday: Karaoke, 10:30 a.m.; Phase 10, 2 p.m.

Monday: Breakfast outing, 8 a.m.; movie, 2 p.m.; social circle, 3:30 p.m.; one-to-one visits, 6 p.m.

Tuesday: Movie, 10:30 a.m.; karaoke, 2 p.m.; social circle, 3:30 p.m.; crossword puzzles, 6 p.m.

Wednesday: Casino outing, 10:30 a.m.; spa treatments with manicures, 2 p.m.; bowling, 3:30 p.m.; one-to-one visits, 6 p.m.

Thursday: Exercise, 10:30 a.m.; bingo, 1:45 p.m.; cards, 3:30 p.m.; one-to-one visits, 6 p.m.

Friday: Catholic Mass, 10:30 a.m.; happy hour, 2 p.m.; bowling, 3:30 p.m.; one-to-one visits, 6 p.m.

Saturday: Tea party, 10:30 a.m.; bingo, 2 p.m.

SENIOR CENTERS

Alpha-Mastodon Center

906-875-3315

The center at 415 Main St. is open four days a week, serving soup and sandwich meal from noon to 1 p.m. Thursdays, fish fries from 4 to 7 p.m. Fridays, pizzas from 4 to 7 p.m. Saturdays and dinner from 2 to 3 p.m. Sundays.

Amasa Center

906-822-7284

Menu for the week —

Tuesday: Smothered chicken, wild rice, vegetable and salad.

Wednesday: Chili and cornbread.

Thursday: Barbecue pork sandwich, fried potatoes, coleslaw and mixed vegetables.

Breen Center

Kingsford

906-774-5110

Open for dine-in eating Monday through Thursday, serving at noon. Friday and night meals are on hold indefinitely. Carryout meals are available. Soup and salad bar are also available. Menu for the week —

Monday: Pasty pie.

Tuesday: Open face hot chicken sandwich, mashed potatoes and corn.

Wednesday: Pork steak, baked potatoes and peas.

Thursday: Italian beef, potato salad and mixed vegetables.

Note: All meals served with a choice of skim milk or juice and fruit.

Crystal Falls Center

Head Cook: Sterling Peryam

Assistant Cook: Bitsy Peryam

906-875-6709

The center is open on Mondays and is serving meals for dine-in or takeout — call the center by 1 p.m. to make reservations or place an order. All food is purchased from local vendors. All dinners include warm vegetables, salad bar, soup, homemade desserts, coffee, tea or milk. Salad bar begins at 4:30 p.m. and dinner is served at 5 p.m. Pickup for takeout meals is 4 p.m. — call ahead and leave a message with phone number. A volunteer will deliver meals to homebound citizens only.

Menu for the week —

Monday: Breaded chicken sandwich and tater tots.

Tuesday: Barbecue country-style ribs, parsley boiled potatoes and cornbread.

Wednesday: Glazed ham and sweet potatoes.

Home-delivered meals (prepared by DICSA — independent from above menu) —

Monday: Cheesy bacon chicken, green beans and fruit.

Tuesday: Swedish meatballs, dinner roll and carrots.

Wednesday: Thin crust sausage pizza, garlic bread and fruit.

Thursday: Stuffed peppers, spiced peaches and cauliflower.

Dickinson-Iron Community Services Agency

DICSA

Iron Mountain

906-774-2256, ext. 230 or 235

This is a Meals on Wheels program only. Home-delivered meals only — call to make arrangements. Menu for the week —

Monday: Cheesy bacon chicken, green beans and fruit.

Tuesday: Swedish meatballs, dinner roll and carrots.

Wednesday: Thin-crust sausage pizza, garlic bread and fruit.

Thursday: Stuffed peppers, spiced peaches and cauliflower.

Friday: Sloppy Joe, four-way vegetables and french fries.

Note: All meals include a choice of skim milk, juice, or no beverage.

For more information, call Christine McMahon at 906-774-2256.

Crystal Lake Center

Iron Mountain

906-828-1776

Schedule for the week:

Monday: Les Artistes’ Art Club, noon to 4 p.m.; woodcarvers, starting at 9 a.m.

Tuesday: Cards, pinochle and cribbage, noon to 4 p.m.; Happy Quilters, noon to 3 p.m.

Wednesday: Bingo, 1 to 3 p.m.; cards cost 25 cents with 10 games played.

Thursday: Spinning Spools quilting, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Friday: Cards, smear, noon to 4 p.m.

Felch Center

906-246-3559

Open for dine-in eating — call for serving times. Carryout meals also available. Menu for the week —

Monday: Pork chops, fried cabbage and carrots.

Tuesday: Macaroni and cheese, ham and coleslaw.

Wednesday: Turkey dressing wrap and chips.

Note: All meals served with skim milk or juice.

Home-delivered meals —

Monday: Cheesy bacon chicken, green beans and fruit.

Tuesday: Swedish meatballs, dinner roll and carrots.

Wednesday: Thin-crust sausage pizza, garlic bread and fruit.

Aging and Disability Resource Center

Florence County, Wis.

715-528-4890

Director: Tiffany White

Menu for the week —

Monday: “Lazy” pierogi casserole, spinach orange salad, breadsticks and fruit.

Tuesday: Boiled dinner (ham, carrots, cabbage, rutabagas, potatoes), breadsticks and fruit.

Wednesday: Porcupine meatballs, mashed potatoes, creamed corn and pumpkin blondies.

Thursday: Turkey ranch wrap (turkey, lettuce, tomato, cheese, spinach wrap), baked beans, potato salad, apple slices and caramel dip.

Friday: Beer-battered fish, sweet potato fries, broccoli and mixed fruit.

Note: All meals served with whole grain bread, butter and milk.

Fence Center/Town Hall

715-336-2980

RSVP for meal at 855-528-2372

Same as ADRC menu, served at noon on Wednesday only.

Florence Community Center/Town Hall

RSVP for meal at 715-528-4261

Same as ADRC menu., served at 11:30 a.m. Monday through Thursday.

Tipler Town Hall

RSVP for meals at 715-674-2320

Same as ADRC menu, served at noon on second Thursday only.

Hillcrest Senior Dining Center, Aurora

RSVP for meals at 715-589-4491

Same as ADRC menu, served at 11:30 a.m. Monday through Friday.

Hermansville Center

Coordinator: Barb Peters

906-498-7735

Center is open 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Monday through Friday. Meals are served through the Menominee-Delta-Schoolcraft Community Action Agency in Escanaba. Meals-On-Wheels program is available for those who are homebound.

Monday: Salisbury steak, mashed potatoes, wax beans, fruit cup and whole wheat bread.

Tuesday: Dinner frank, hot dog bun, oven potatoes, corn on the cob and fruited pudding.

Wednesday: Monterey chicken, smashed red potatoes, mixed vegetables, dinner roll and pineapple upside down cake.

Thursday: Cheese stuffed shells, spaghetti sauce (no meat), broccoli, breadstick and fruit cup.

Friday: Pollock fish, baked potato, peas and carrots, fruit cup, whole wheat bread and ice cream.

Iron River Center

906-265-6134

Open for dine-in eating, serving at 11 a.m. Salad bar is available. No night meals at this time. Carryout meals also available. Menu for the week —

Monday: Chicken and rice, vegetable and dinner roll.

Tuesday: Stuffed pepper casserole, macaroni and cheese and dinner roll.

Wednesday: Chef salad, fruit and cottage cheese.

Thursday: Salisbury steak, mashed potatoes and green beans.

Niagara Senior Center/Cafe

715-251-1603

The center is open, and dinner is served at noon on Monday through Thursday. Reservations are required one day in advance. Suggested donation is $5 for those older than 60 and $11 for 60 and younger. Bingo played on most Wednesdays. Transportation is available.

Monday: Beef stroganoff with noodles, green beans and fruit muffin.

Tuesday: Herb chicken filet, gravy, rice pilaf, vegetables and fruit with topping.

Wednesday: Pork steak, au gratin potatoes, corn, Jell-O poke cake.

Thursday: Football party — brat on a bun, potato wedges, three bean salad and cookie.

The center will host bingo on Mondays and Wednesdays this month.

Norway Center

Director: Joyce Olesky

Head Cook: Brian Gutkowski. 

906-563-8716

Open for dine-in eating beginning at 11:15 a.m. Salad bar is available from 10:30 to 11 a.m. Takeout meals will remain available for pick-up from 11 to 11:30 a.m. Let staff know if planning to dine in or pick up. Menu for the week —

Monday: Roast beef over bread, mashed potatoes with gravy and vegetable.

Tuesday: Fish patty on a bun, cheesy potatoes and vegetables.

Wednesday: Liver or burger with onions, mashed potatoes with gravy and vegetables.

Thursday: Lasagna, breadstick/garlic bread and vegetable.

All meals include milk, juice, fruit, bread and dessert.

Center activity schedule:

Mondays and Thursdays — Exercise at 10 a.m. and card bingo after the meal.

Monday through Thursday — Card game 101 from noon to 3 p.m. Call Joe at 906-563-5587 for information.

Tuesdays — Quilting and sewing.

Wednesdays — Ceramics and crocheting.

Last Monday of each month — Book club at 9 a.m.

Second Thursday of each month — Birthdays and bingo.

Sagola Center

906-542-3273

Open for dine-in eating — call for serving times. Carryout meals also available. Menu for the week —

Tuesday: Sloppy Joes, sweet potato fries and mixed vegetables.

Wednesday: Chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese sandwich.

Thursday: Meatloaf, potato wedges and green beans.

All meals served with an option of milk, juice or no beverage.

Home-delivered meals —

Monday: Cheesy bacon chicken, green beans and fruit.

Tuesday: Swedish meatballs, dinner roll and carrots.

Wednesday: Thin-crust sausage pizza, garlic bread and fruit.