Memes lost on mom
Dear Annie: I have an adult son who is married and lives on the East Coast. I follow them on social media to keep up with their lives, as we are in the Midwest. My daughter-in-law often posts disrespectful posts towards my son — memes with rolling eyes, jokes about animals that look like him to her, etc. She is very different from us in terms of her political views and other things. It infuriates and saddens me when she posts these disrespectful posts about my son that I think she believes are funny. I have never addressed it with either of them, but I do want to say something about the disrespect to my son. How should I approach this? I never see any balanced appreciation or complimentary posts from her to him either. — Worried Mom
Dear Worried: What looks like disrespect to you may be affectionate playfulness to her and your son. Internet humor is often irreverent without malice. Consider whether her having different political views might predispose you to take these posts as offensive, and try to let it go. If your son hasn’t expressed that he’s bothered by it, then there’s no reason to let it bother you.
Dear Annie: I am 50 years old with two college degrees and three certifications. I am facing what I believe is a dilemma among women like me who are single. The friends I knew who are coupled up have treated me like the “background friend” where I’m not included in their activities due to not being a part of a couple. But instead of feeling sorry for myself, I moved on from them.
My question is this: I do occasionally enjoy being social, even though I am an introvert. The trouble is that most activities for adults are not single-friendly. I know we are still working our way out of a major pandemic, but are there some places where I can meet other single adults my age? Keep in mind that I have been fully vaccinated as I am asking this.
In the meantime, how can I combat the loneliness I sometimes feel? Are there any virtual Meetup events? That’s what I’m willing to stick with until it’s safe to socialize. — Desiring to Move On
Dear Desiring: Meetup.com is a great place to discover new hobbies and friends, and you can indeed still find groups on there who are meeting on Zoom. (Book clubs work well in that format). And, in the longer term, there are plenty of other ways to connect with people in your community. Get involved: Donate your time to a nonprofit (check volunteermatch.org), campaigning for a cause or nourishing your creative spirit with a local arts group or anything else that lights a spark in your heart. There’s nothing like the solidarity of working with others toward a project you believe in.
Dear Annie: This is in response to “Dealing with the Fallout,” whose husband was disgusted with her family for their activities during the pandemic. Murphy’s Law of Righteousness remains in full force: “The world is divided between the righteous and the unrighteous and the righteous draw the line.”
(With the caveat that righteousness and being right do sometimes — though rarely — co-occur.) I thoroughly enjoy your column. Keep on truckin’. — Jack
Dear Jack: I have to confess I’d never heard that saying before, but I’ll certainly be using it in the future. Thanks for the wisdom and the laugh.